Pre-Marital Counseling

Premarital counseling is a type of therapy that helps couples prepare for marriage or if you are in the first few years of a serious relationship. It can ensure that you and your partner have a strong, healthy relationship, and giving you a better chance for a stable and satisfying marriage, if that is your goal. This kind of counseling can also help you identify weaknesses that could become problems during marriage. You will be encouraged to discuss topics related to marriage, such as:

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• Finances

• Communication

• Beliefs and values

• Roles in marriage

• Affection and sex

• Desire to have children

• Family relationships

• Decision-making

• Dealing with anger

• Time spent together

• How you love

• How you want to be loved

 

It can help partners improve their ability to communicate, set realistic expectations for marriage and develop conflict-resolution skills. In addition, premarital counseling can help couples establish a positive attitude about seeking help down the road. The end goal here is to make sure you and your partner are on the same page and work towards the health of the unit (your relationship). We can fill your toolbox with concrete skills and tools you can use for the rest of your marriage.

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Relationship & Marriage Counseling

The major aim of therapy is increasing your knowledge about yourself, your partner and the patterns of interaction between you. How you respond to yourself greatly impacts how you respond to your partner. Therapy becomes effective as you apply new knowledge to break ineffective patterns and develop better ones.

When infidelity is an issue, healing requires more than just apologies. The person needs to understand the seriousness of his actions; the person needs to take responsibility for their behavior and the pain that is has caused.  Perhaps most importantly, both partners need to recognize that the infidelity is almost always a symptom of a much larger problem. For the relationship to be saved, trust must be re-established, and this takes time.

Regardless of the reason you are seeking counseling for your relationship there are key tasks of couples therapy that can increase your clarity about:

 

• The kind of life you want to build together

• The kind of partner you aspire to be in order to build the kind of life and relationship you want to create

• Your individual blocks to becoming the kind of partner you aspire to be

• The skills and knowledge necessary to do the above tasks

 

A more powerful approach to your couples therapy sessions is for each person to do the following before each session:

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1. Reflect on your objectives for being in therapy.  The work should not and does not end with the end of the session.

2. Think about your next step that supports or relates to your larger objectives for the kind of relationship you wish to create, or the partner you aspire to become.

Some of the things you will learn in couples counseling is:

 

• Understand and comfort your partner even when you disagree and tell your partner what you want instead of expecting your partner to know

• Fair fight

• Show support for your partner’s goals 

• Listen to your partner with your heart 

• Show affection 

• Heal each other with LACE (Love, Appreciation, Compassion, Empathy)Understand

• how a sincere intention to change can make a significant difference in your marriage

 

Using the PAIRS model I offer you practical skills to empower you to find your own relationship answers, strategies, and solutions. I offer you tools, empower you to use them, and help you see and break barriers to you connecting with your partner.